New era.

Finally left the 'zoo' last Tuesday and have been on a short break, hence my not posting for a while. On Wednesday I fly out to Ondangwa and will now be there for 3 months. Kind of having mixed feelings about it. I am excited that I will have space to myself and experience a different environment , but I am not so happy leaving my familiar life even for just 3 months. Whatever my feelings now, there is no going back. So I have 2 more days to pack up and sort things here.
It is the dawn of a new era in my life. Bring it on!!

Last days at the "zoo"

I am counting my days here. I await the dawn of a new era in my life. My fight has been paid for and the internet being connected.

I am also anxious as this is the first time for me to be away from Windhoek, away from family and friends, away from familiar routines and surroundings. I have lived in Windhoek since 2002. I wonder what the people will be like, what the environment is like, will I be happy there?.

Ok, this is how I choose to see my stay there:
I am extremely comfortable with everything
I have good working relations with everyone
I am healthy and full of energy.
I enjoy the work each and every day and the days just fly by so quick.
I have a perfect job in a perfect way
I give a perfect service for a perfect pay.

Got a job

I have just confirmed a locum for about two and a half months at a pharmacy I told you about in the North of Namibia. I just decided to go with the flow- I mean, this is a job which just landed onto my lap with no sweat on my part, so why not take it. Gees , the amount of money I'll make will boost my savings tremendously. I can literally see London in the horizon. I am still anxious as it's a different place but at the same time I am happy. And they have said they'll look into my having an internet connection at the house I'll be staying. It means no rent, transport provided or paid for, free air travel to and fro and with the internet available, what more can a girl ask for
:-)

Blue Monday

I almost cried as I woke up this morning (ok, I have exaggerated a bit but you catch the drift). I really desire to work at home, on the internet and not having to get up when I'm still sleepy. Oh, is this the way of life? What a draaaggg!

I am determined to live a happy , fulfilling, abundant and fun life and I know, it is I who has the power to change my life. God help me.

I made a decision to cut the time spent watching TV by myself and my brothers.How have I done that? By removing the card from the decoder.Am I being too mean? Here's how I 'justify' it: I perceive that instead of focusing on their lives and thinking about how to improve their lives, they just bury themselves in movies non-stop and now TV has become like a drug. I know because it also affects me that way though these days I'm more conscious of how I spend my time and I know that at the end of the day time spent watching TV is gone and lost forever.

But do we understand this? Do we understand that we have to protect our minds from the junk shown on TV and elsewhere? Do we know that the mind just absorbs whatever it is presented with?. I have come to understand this and strive most of the time to filter what I come into contact with. It's not easy but with time it can be done. So cutting down TV time will definitely help me, and I hope it will help them too.

And no, they were not too thrilled about it.Gees, it's scary come to think about how easy it is to get addicted to a thing like TV. I am definitely getting crowned 'the Queen of Mean'

Gratitude party

Today, I attended a party (sort of) at a friend's house. It was in celebration of the recent renovations she undertook at her house. She was thanking God for enabling her to have the renovations done. I have never seen such a person of faith in my life and am also grateful that she is a friend. She always inspires and reminds me to walk with God always. God bless you Kudzi.

On another note, I am really getting motivated to get my internet business going. Now I have learnt that it is best to have multiple streams of income and already have eyed some interesting programmes. Now I am also careful of scams so I have to make wise decisions otherwise it's more money down the drain. There is this saying in my country that goes :( it is broken English)
'If they did it , why can't I also did it.' If there are people out there really earning a living on the internet, then why can't I do it as well- I am going to succeed......eventually

Happy Birthday

It's my youngest brother's birthday. His name is Lance and he has turned 24, so that makes me.......ummh, let's not go there. He is a great person and I wish him all the best and all of God's blessings
Happy birthday..Igweeee!!!

Today's Daily Word - Friday, February 17, 2006
Employment
Right and perfect employment is seeking me. Thank You, God!
If I am seeking employment, I envision the perfect and right position also seeking me. It calls to me--as a job or career in which I give my best and receive my best.
My confidence about the possibilities grows. I hear myself saying, "Yes, this is it! A perfect fit!" I picture a smile on the face of the person hiring me. I hear the confirmation: "We've been waiting for you. You're hired, because you are the right person for this job, and the job is right for you."
Whatever my current work is or whatever capacity I explore in the future, I know it is an outlet through which I give _expression to my God-given skills and talents. My right and perfect place is where I contribute, learn, and grow. It is where I am prospered and fulfilled as I both give and receive.
I am in my right and perfect place!
"David had success in all his undertakings; for the Lord was with him."--1 Samuel 18:14

A bit of wisdom

Thought I'd share this with you.Got it in my mail

QUOTE OF THE DAY:
Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence.Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessfulpeople with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius isalmost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan "press on" has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race. -- Calvin Coolidge

It's so true it hurts. Educated derelicts- oh my word! So be persistent and determined and success is yours . ( I'm actually telling myself )

Grown up kids

I realise that I have lots of weaknesses. One of them is being judgemental. I find myself judging people just like that, noticing their faults and all. Gees, what about my faults? I need to learn to accept and love people as they are , just like God loves me.

Have a situation at home right now. I have 3 brothers (who are like grown up kids) who came over here to look for 'greener pastures' . Of course I love them all and want the best for them, but many times I resent them for "making me look after them". I just feel they are too relaxed and not making real effort to get jobs. I feel robbed of the time when I should be enjoying my singlehood, enjoying my home etc. Now it's like being back at my parent's home. The worst bit is they abuse alcohol any time they get their hands on it and just seem not to be able to handle money.

My strategy now is to accept them and the situation as it is, assist them whenever they ask for help but at the same time avoid over-indulging them and avoid creating their dependency on me. Time for tough love. I can only live and be responsible for my life and they have to accept responsibility fo theirs. I always read that one cannot change another person. That's a recipe for disaster. It is the person themself who have to want and be willing to change.

Talk about learning life lessons. Good news is this will not stop me from pursuing my dreams and I have made it absolutely clear.

Calm

I feel calm. I feel no need to hassle about anything.What will be will be. I love the state I am in now. Almost feels like I'm waiting for a genie to magically make my dreams come true. Well, why not?

Got my Tony Robbins CD's- the power of persuasion. I am now convinced that I made a good decision to book a seat for his upcoming conference in London. He speaks well, he does motivate and he is a bundle of energy. Just by listening to his voice, I have already deduced this. Talk about a man living a life full of purpose. I wonder what impact this will have on me, I really wonder. Is this the final push I need to get me off my laurels and get moving? I sure hope so.

AArrrrghhhhh!!- I hate a runny nose

It's the weekend and for the first time in weeks it has not rained. See, Namibia is a desert country so it hardly rains here. There have actually been floods in some places and the city where I live, Windhoek, is unusually green. It's been really nice weather over the past weeks without the usual heat.

So much for a good day, I am down with a cold. I'm not thrilled because normally I catch it before it catches me. Being a pharmacist I know exactly what to do , so I end up only having mild symptoms . But not this time. So have spent the day, not in bed, but on my favourite couch watching TV. Hope to shake it off quick.

Got an interesting e-mail from someone................let me end it there...for now :-). Will let you in later if there are any developments. And Valentine's day is just around the corner. Can't even remember when last I had a real Valentine's day. Last had a real 'love life' way back in 2002. after that I was in a long distance relationship which ended last year. Anyway, life goes on and I am going to find love.....eventually.

Zoo life

My workplace feels like a zoo at times. Or is it me who has a problem? You get colleagues singing and playing the radio with the volume so high everyone else can hear. Talk about lack of consideration.Can't wait to get out of this zoo! Guess I have lessons to learn from all this- tolerance maybe.

Now back to my dilemma, it's not a dilemma anymore.I do know what I want to do- emigrate to the UK. So if I do that via Australia or Canada , no problem. But I'll take the shortest path. So my focus is back on my impending postgraduate year. My bank says they are still working on my student loan. I've decided to take out this loan rather than depend totally on scholarships which I may never get.I know that I'll easily pay it back- talk about faith in action. So it's time to be patient and not needy. Neediness drives the thing that you want away-even applies to relationships. So no neediness from me.

Oh what a day. Yes , the dilemma continues.I guess looke upon in another way I am fortunate to actually have a choice to make.I am grateful for that.

However, there was a situation at work regarding my termination.Turns out that my boss doesn't want to terminate my work as such and made an offer to pay me an allowance every month including my medical aid and to renew my work permit in exchange for remaining affiliated with the company. God does work in mysterious ways.Now with this offer I can actually remain legal in the country and have my basic needs paid for. Just said I'd think about it.I am actually happy about it after all .(you should have seen me this morning-I was furious). See I don't like being taken advantage of and felt my boss was doing that. I made it clear that I was not happy and he apologized. It is said things happen for a reason- true.

On a lighter note, here's something I read yesterday evening(I love books , reading and writing). It's from a book called "I am rich beyond my wildest dreams, I am, I am". Freaky title? Well, I am a bit freaky.I think it's cool to be rich and desire to be, hence me reading such stuff.When I say rich I mean enjoying abundance in every area of my life; spiritually, mentally, materially , being healthy and having fulfilling relationships. This really struck a cord regarding my life as a bird. Ok, here is the excerpt:

"In nature, the Universal Intelligence allows birds to thrive, grass to grow and fish to flourish all without any special effort. The earth itself spins and circles the sun with no help from humankind.Nature prospers easily and effortlessly.Humans are part of that ecosystem.We, too, are destined to prosper easily and effortlessly"

Isn't that wonderful news? But something so easy becomes difficult because of our ego and limited thinking. What a shame. I am learning how to go past my ego and wrong mindset. Will let you in on my progress.

My dilemma continues.Now it's worse coz I have another friend who reckons I should go kuCanada and she is willing to provide accomodation. I have also considered Canada to the extent of downloading application forms etc. Now what? I know at the end of the day , it's my call. But it doesn't hurt to keep my options open either, I think. Time for some deep meditation to get the solution for me. Isn't it amazing that a few days ago I thought I was sure of myself , now am shaky because of other people's thoughts. No , I am not that unstable or am I? But I do know that like I said earlier, it's my life , it's my call. And for whatever action I take, I bear full responsibility for the outcome.

At least I am going back home to see my mum and dad and to just take time out. I know I'll be clear of what to do when I come back.This should be at the end of February.Looking forward to it and come to think of it, I do miss home.

UK vs Australia

I must say now I am in a state of confusion.A very good friend of mine, who lives in Perth called me over the weekend and 'lectured' me on why I should go to Australia rather than the UK. She did a rather good job trashing the UK.Valid points she made I must admit and above all she is willing to help me find my feet, something I won't have in the UK.
So I'm reconsidering my options and today the song in my head is UK or Australia? UK or Australia? UK or Australia?

TGIF
Thank God it's Friday.Can't wait to just enjoy time at home, working on my websites.Yeah I know it sounds boring but i am at a stage in my life where I just want to chill out. believe me I had my 'wild days' a few years back

Oh, did I tell you that I am determined to one day work from home earning my entire income from the internet.There are lots of people doing it so I reckon I can do it too.But I have to admit it hasn't been easy for me to get started.And at some point I suffered the famous 'paralysis by analysis'.Just got myself overloaded by too much information to the point where I just didn't or rather couldn't make any move. Not a nice place to be- believe me. But beginning of this year , I just decided to take some action even though I wasn't sure of what I was doing. And guess what- it's working. Just taking action has gotten the ball rolling.Now I can't wait to make a dime- yes even a single dollar would be great. Don't believe any of the get-rich-now scams floating on the internet.It simply doesn't work like that-it actually violates the universal principle of sowing and reaping. You sow first , then you reap. Never the other way round. You don't sow today and harvest tomorrow. No no. So now I am relaxed about it and am taking any little action I can everyday. Initially I had hoped that I would be making an income online before my job ends but it hasn't happened yet.

And talking about my job, a friend phoned me today saying he had a job for me.There is a pharmacy in the north of Namibia looking for a locum pharmacist and I said yes.So I am expecting a call from that pharmacy. See, my God is already moving to take care of me.

And I almost forgot.Yesterday I got a present from a colleague of mine, Geraldine. She works in the pharmacy that my company is opening shortly and we are a road apart.So we spend lunch times together.She is a truly remarkable person. So yesterday she asked me to go over to the pharmacy coz she had something for me . And she surprised me with a gift , an anytime gift. Here's what it was- a cute little box with cards - on them written verses from the Bible called 'Daily Bread'. I had wanted that for quite a while after learning about the cards from her.She got her's as a gift from a friend of her's. It's a chain reaction- so who am I going to buy for next? I'll see about that. Oh I was so happy and had an ear-to-ear smile afterwards :-)

So now what I do with Geraldine is to share the verses each one picks for the day. It is really uplifting and more fun than sitting with an entire bible ( that's me speaking ). Here's my verse for today:
2 Thessalonians 3:3
But the Lord is faithful, who shall stablish you, and keep you from evil

Have a great weekend!!

Thursday, February 2,2006

It's my brothers' birthday today.They are twins and turn 36. I do wish them the best life ever and God's blessings always.
I'm in the 'lazy mode'. You know when you feel like just doing nothing but stare into empty space. Maybe I'll find a book to read that'll motivate me now. I love reading and am always buying books online- just love e-books coz I get them straight away with no need to wait weeks for shipment.I have to tell you this- I absolutely am in love with the internet_ I say the good far outweighs the bad on the net and I have been literally transformed into a new person just through the information I have come across.

It would be an absolute pleasure for me to meet the people who got this thing started.I want to give them a good bear hug and express my deepest gratitude. It's Thursday already and that makes the weekend a day away- yippie!!!. See I am just tired of being in the rat race and am most alive when I'm not at work.What's that mean?? I feel I'll be living my ideal life soon- remember the bird story. Can't wait for events to unfold in my life. But for now, I'll continue gazing into space or rather my computer screen.